Features
- Hair Down Where?
- Words from the Top
- Frustrating Moments in the life of:
- Sketch Comedy
- Why Cross-Country Is Not a Sport
- How to Die
- To: sex@dailycal.org
- The Happiest Day on Earth in the Happiest Place on Earth
- My Secret Romance With Stephen Hawking
- Bizarro Jesus Christ
Newsflashes
- Flag Count Dangerously Low, Warns Pentagon
- Mayfield Cougars Locke Down Victory
- Amazon.com Wanted for Anthrax Mailing
- Olympic Hopes Dashed
- Teachers Not Artists, Study Finds
- Wifebeater Wifebeaten
- Holmoe: “I Have Nothing Left to Prove”
- Boy Goes to Jupiter, Gets More Stupider
- Student Really Creeped Out by Olsen Twins Poster
- Bad Dreams Afoot
Top Tens
- Top Ten Lifetime Original Movies
- Top Ten Wild Animals
- Top Ten Poorly Conceived Superhero Duos
- Top Ten Ways to Avoid Getting Flyered on Sproul
- Top Ten Alternate Names for Urinal Splashback
- Top Ten Changes in Post-Taliban Kabul
- Top Ten Ways to Annoy People in an Elevator
- Top Ten Farewell Gifts for Tom Holmoe
- Top Five Wartime Pick-Up Lines
- Top Ten Signs You’re in the Wrong Neighborhood
