Features
- Letters to the Editors
- Ask Buffy
- Biased, Fragmented Political Coverage
- Love My Way
- Columns are Stupid
- History of Valentine’s Day
- Eat Shit & Live
- E-mail addresses
- Eat Drink Man Woman
- The Squelch Video Guide
Newsflashes
Top Tens
- Top Ten Features We’d Like to See on the New Macintosh
- Top Ten Rejected Plastic Surgeries
- Top Ten Books in the Bible You’ve Never Heard of
- Top Ten Alternative Names for Valentine’s Day
- Top Ten Things to Do After Giving Head
- Top Ten Pornos from Antiquity
- Top Ten Homosexualized TV Shows
- Top Ten Rejected Names For Upcoming Green Day Album
- Top Ten Rejected Smurfs Characters
- Top Ten Failed Business Ventures
