- Safety word “grwerwerwer” sounds lot like signal for fuck me harder “grwerfwere”
- You already went black bear and now you can’t go back
- Relationship dying due to language bear-ier
- “Fuck Buddies” means different things to each of you
- Everywhere you
… Read More
- Low scores from celebrity judges
- It’s going good – you just have poor grammar
- Your wife is starting to suspect you didn’t go up there to fish
- It’s been half an hour, and you still have to say over a
… Read More
- Peter Parkinson’s and Spider-Maningitis
- Genital Mono
- Whatever you get from sleeping with Jessica Alba
- Alzheimer’s if you recently watched your family be mauled by tigers
- That type of cancer that makes you crap Beanie Babies
- Tickle-Cell Anemia
- HIV Negative
- The
… Read More
- She keeps asking if she can burrow money
- In spring, as soon as the first grass peeks through the snow, she
- She got a C in English because all she can say is
- She covers her bedroom floor with CosmoGirl!
… Read More
- Squat Claimers
- Silt on My Face
- Two in the Pinkerton
- Mother Loads
- Snow White and the Seven Dwarves: Uncensored
- The Further Adventures of John Shovel-Cock
- Sluice Boxes, Loose Foxes and Moose Cockses (illegal in US)
- Sluice Boxes and Loose Foxes
… Read More
- Holocausts you a fortune
- Strippers are Jewish women
- You didn’t go for a couple of weeks and now every time you go back they ask how come you never visit
- Stripper’s name is Crystal Nacht
- You’re OPEC and you don’t
… Read More
- Your Cal sweatshirt is dirty
- Because you wear a stylish blouse, miniskirt, and heels to bed every night
- Zipper stuck on onesie
- Your bookie accepts laundry as currency
- Out of tampons
- Show me someone who can get through fifty minutes
… Read More
- World’s second best pesto
- Training for being upcoming contestant in who wants to be a millionaire
- 500k for Elisha Cuthbert blowjob; 500k for guy to knock her teeth out before hand
- Paying two dogs to fall in love
- Two nights
… Read More
- Throwing a really hard penny off the top of a model of the Empire State Building
- Lite-brite saber
- Syphil-them
- Prison consensual sex
- Single Sclerosis
- NRA: National Ruffle Association
- The Heck’s Angels
- Black guy in cage
- Bungie walking
- Drinking a gallon
… Read More
- You married a slutty horse
- Hideous centaur children
- Douches with molasses, apples and salt
- Find the words “Mrs. Ed” written lovingly all over her day-planner
- Everytime you answer the phone, hear 4 minutes of a horse trying to hang up
… Read More