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top ten | The Heuristic Squelch
Playing music for money on your ipod
Masturbating in private
Spending a day’s worth of change on a six-pack of O’Douls
Eating faithful canine companion
Dying during winter
Touching appropriately
Hopping on a moving freight plane
Using the needle first … Read More
<u>It</u> has herpes, and <u>it</u> doesn’t whine about it
Its favorite movie is Fight Club, yours is Mulan
You die of it
Smokes Cigarettes, unfiltered
Frequents the 24 Hr. Fitness located somewhere near your butt-hole
… Read More
I interpret drunken making out as an invitation to a long term relationship
This counts as your turn
Quick, before my dad stops watching!
Thank god, I thought I was going to have to throw up in my hands
Your … Read More
It’s cold. And you’re a child molester
When you were five a razor killed your father
Pink chin the pirate sounds too pussy
President of the female Viking student association
President of the Viking student association
Rogaine addiction
Your name … Read More
Holocausts you a fortune
Strippers are Jewish women
You didn’t go for a couple of weeks and now every time you go back they ask how come you never visit
Stripper’s name is Crystal Nacht
You’re OPEC and you don’t … Read More
Your Cal sweatshirt is dirty
Because you wear a stylish blouse, miniskirt, and heels to bed every night
Zipper stuck on onesie
Your bookie accepts laundry as currency
Out of tampons
Show me someone who can get through fifty minutes … Read More
World’s second best pesto
Training for being upcoming contestant in who wants to be a millionaire
500k for Elisha Cuthbert blowjob; 500k for guy to knock her teeth out before hand
Paying two dogs to fall in love
Two nights … Read More
Can’t kill you unless he’s had a few beers first
Won’t say I love you back
Always kills you with his eyes closed
Business card trademark not as cool or complicated as old blood of fifty orphans spread across a … Read More
These “Kiss Me I’m a Leper” shirts don’t work very well at all
INDIAN BURN!
Is that a banana in your sock or are you just glad to see me?
Wow, I’ve already lost 140 pounds on this diet
I … Read More
Paraplegic midget actually black slang for really talented Basketball player
He was on steroids … for his asthma
He only became paraplegic midget at half-time
His canine companion was Air Bud
He had more heart … and more lung because … Read More