Tag Archives: Mark Thomas

Veteran Weeps Uncontrollably

The fragile remains of local auto mechanic and Vietnam veteran Jacob Renwood’s feeble grasp on reality disintegrated Thursday night during a commercial for a Vietnam-themed video game. “It brought me back,” sobbed Renwood, lamenting his lost youth, “you know, to … Read More

Words from the Top

JOKE! Apologies Are for Ethnics

_Last month, we ran a piece called “A Guide to University Speech Codes.” However, we seem to have forgotten to include the word “JOKE!” in big block letters before satirizing the climate of hysterical political correctness on college campuses. In … Read More

History? OK!

From the dawn of human civilization to its apex in the mid-1920s and beyond, people have been compiling quite a file that in its wisdom calls history. History documents many important things for its present-day pupils, for instance the evolution … Read More

I’m a Liar

It’s not that I’m a liar, it’s just that I’m often tricked into lying. And nothing makes me lie more than conversing in a foreign language. Well, maybe dead whores.

Practicing verbal skills is essential in a foreign language class. … Read More