- Why is his hand still on my cock?
- Why does he get a football scholarship if the team’s just going to get its ass kicked anyway?
- If the Chinese are so good at laundry, how come his clothes are always
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- Alan Greenspan (’cause he’s a penis)
- Yours
- Mine
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- Dignity
- The monolith from 2001
- A surprise party
- A cat, a radioactive isotope, triggering device, and poison
- Carton of milk
- Wolf bait
- Safeway club card
- The “monium” list
- A Fabuloso burrito
- A giant, steaming turd
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- This list blows-monium
- Make yo bitch monium
- Monimonium
- Vic DeMonium
- Alimonium
- Plutoniumonium
- Koalamonium
- Pandemonium
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- Honey Bunches of Lamb
- Venison Krispies
- Frosted Mini-Meats
- Cinnamon Roast Crunch
- Meaties
- Shredded Beef
- Ducky Charms
- Goatmeal
- Cracklin’ Pork Bran
- Sausage Loops
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- Make thousands of gremlins
- Massage Shirley Dean’s big
greasy bologna tits
- Make enormous amounts of
Ramen
- Sit on the drain and get your ass
sucked out of your ass
- Have high-power Japanese
business meetings
- Wear floaties
- Burn your nut sack
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- Poland
- The Canadian Dream
- “Bye, bye Miss Canadian Pie”
- Guess Who’s hit song “Canadian
Woman”
- War
- David Bowie’s “Young Canadian”
- Canadian Graffiti
- 0.33-meter-long hot dogs
- Canadian cheese singles
- American bacon
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- France
- Mass
- Wildlife
- Child labor laws
- Meat on the bone
- Reveling
- Treating the Irish as human
beings
- Daryl Strawberry
- Smiling
- Having any pudding before eating
your meat
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- “No, seriously, what the fuck is
romance philology?”
- “What the fuck is romance
philology?”
- “The new guy’s double majoring
in something useful. Kill him.”
- “Some of us don’t need to earn
money after college, Mr. Bourgeois
Oppressor.”
- “Some guys are
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- “That’s not rigor mortis!”
- “We’ve secretly replaced the embalming fluid with Folger’s Crystals… let’s watch.”
- “You’re right – it does taste just like chicken!”
- “Where does this piece go?”
- “Well, if she hadn’t died, she’d be 18 by now…”
- “I
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