- <u>It</u> has herpes, and <u>it</u> doesn’t whine about it
- Its favorite movie is Fight Club, yours is Mulan
- You die of it
- Smokes Cigarettes, unfiltered
- Frequents the 24 Hr. Fitness located somewhere near your butt-hole
… Read More
- I interpret drunken making out as an invitation to a long term relationship
- This counts as your turn
- Quick, before my dad stops watching!
- Thank god, I thought I was going to have to throw up in my hands
- Your
… Read More
- It’s cold. And you’re a child molester
- When you were five a razor killed your father
- Pink chin the pirate sounds too pussy
- President of the female Viking student association
- President of the Viking student association
- Rogaine addiction
- Your name
… Read More
- Identical twin failed to shave goatee
- Turns out bank has no wheelchair ramp
- Hot air balloon escape not as practical as you thought for nail gun factory heist
- Flying a plane is actually really hard
- Pirates are late. AGAIN
- Your
… Read More
- She keeps asking if she can burrow money
- In spring, as soon as the first grass peeks through the snow, she
- She got a C in English because all she can say is
- She covers her bedroom floor with CosmoGirl!
… Read More
- Squat Claimers
- Silt on My Face
- Two in the Pinkerton
- Mother Loads
- Snow White and the Seven Dwarves: Uncensored
- The Further Adventures of John Shovel-Cock
- Sluice Boxes, Loose Foxes and Moose Cockses (illegal in US)
- Sluice Boxes and Loose Foxes
… Read More
- Holocausts you a fortune
- Strippers are Jewish women
- You didn’t go for a couple of weeks and now every time you go back they ask how come you never visit
- Stripper’s name is Crystal Nacht
- You’re OPEC and you don’t
… Read More
- Your Cal sweatshirt is dirty
- Because you wear a stylish blouse, miniskirt, and heels to bed every night
- Zipper stuck on onesie
- Your bookie accepts laundry as currency
- Out of tampons
- Show me someone who can get through fifty minutes
… Read More
- World’s second best pesto
- Training for being upcoming contestant in who wants to be a millionaire
- 500k for Elisha Cuthbert blowjob; 500k for guy to knock her teeth out before hand
- Paying two dogs to fall in love
- Two nights
… Read More
- Can’t kill you unless he’s had a few beers first
- Won’t say I love you back
- Always kills you with his eyes closed
- Business card trademark not as cool or complicated as old blood of fifty orphans spread across a
… Read More
