Top Ten Reasons to Wear Pajamas to Class

  1. Your Cal sweatshirt is dirty
  2. Because you wear a stylish blouse, miniskirt, and heels to bed every night
  3. Zipper stuck on onesie
  4. Your bookie accepts laundry as currency
  5. Out of tampons
  6. Show me someone who can get through fifty minutes of Nutri Sci 1 without masturbating, and I’ll show you a wheelchair kid with no arms whose assistant is off today
  7. You are a ghost who died during a slumber party in 251 Dwinelle
  8. Need to keep up image as one of those
  9. You don’t yet have a boyfriend, but are probably too fat to get one. Or fit into pants, tubby
  10. You already have a boyfriend