Let’s face it; the Internet had a lot to offer in its heyday: earth-shattering breakthroughs in communication, data access, and commerce, just to name a few. Yeah, the Internet was pretty cool.
Around the same time the idea of a … Read More
Tag Archives: feature
Being a Male Porn Star Is Hard Work
By Miles O’Dong
Most people think that being a male porn star is a glamorous job. That all day it’s just sex and making that one face. But it’s not. For one
thing, it’s hard to tell where work ends and where everyday … Read More
Words from the Top
Enemy Mine
Everyone needs an enemies list. With all the talk of national disunity and the red/blue divide, I figure this “healing” is just a clever tactic. That’s right, they lull you into a false sense of security, then BAM, Senator Joe … Read More
The Adventures of Sven Bjolnir
Viking High School Student
Girls
Thor: [Grinning, surrounded by giggling wenches, showing off gleaming
warhammer] Yeah, I made this sweet little hunk of steel. Smithed her from the fire of a thousand stars. Oh, and did I mention that I
killed the evil serpent … Read More
A Day in the Life of D. West
That Drill Sergeant in Army Camos Who Goes on <i>The Maury Povich Show</i> and Yells at People
10:42 AM: Morning taping of Maury Povich Show. Yelled at 13-year-old hussy
until she tearfully promised to change her ways. Spent further 20 minutes yelling at her tears.
12:04 PM: Lunch break from taping. Yelled at deli worker until he … Read More
Sigmund Freud’s Forgotten Sessions
Many psychologists regard Sigmund Freud as one of the most influential psychologists of all time. But these people are forgetting that his “medical advice” consisted of huge amounts of cocaine GAA which, last time I checked, was responsible for people … Read More
I Am Smarter Than You
Hey you. So you think you are so smart, with your handlebar mustache and Swarovski crystal monocle, but do not nod your top hat and shake your mutton chops resolutely in wondrous awe of your own perspicacity. Maybe you won … Read More
19th Century Job Interviews
Boss: I understand you’re applying for…chimney sweep, Mr. Thorped?
Jimmer: Jimmer Thorped, best sweep in Merry England, sir! Sharp as Big Ben’s toll, I am.
Boss: Tortured analogies…good, good. And you’re an orphan by…?
Jimmer: Right sorry, governor?
Boss: Orphaned … Read More
Make Your Own Action Movie
The Briefing
Government Official: (gravely) I assume you all know why you’ve been called in here today. We’ve got three hours/seven days to diffuse this atomic/biological warhead planted by the notorious global corporation/ syndicate globotron/corp. I know you’re all just … Read More
Cosmetic Surgery for Animals
It is apparent that our society is becoming increasingly sexualized. From Lindsay Lohan’s big-ass titties to Donald Rumsfeld’s vagina tightening, male and female sexuality are being pushed to the limits through the wonders of cosmetic surgery. The pressure to look … Read More
