- He used to hunt the hunted. Now he is hunted by those he used to hunt.
- Sometimes decapitation is just the beginning.
- He was just an ordinary Joe who spent 20 years in the Green Berets…
- Vin Diesel
- Just when
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- Crying like a woman
- Your scary gay lisp
- Attempting to break up riot with rousing game of Magic: The Gathering
- Introducing yourself as “Fish”
- Pre-emptive cocksucking
- Gently turning down their advancements
- Shaving your legs
- Making cell key into knife
- Becoming
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- Whatever the mother of the Wayans kids was doing
- Semen-covered dildo
- Going to a party at Pi Kappa Phi
- Eye of newt
- Getting pregnant
- Visiting my room
- Screen-door condoms
- Rhythm method, but you’re white and have no rhythm
- Twist Ties
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- Borg Cube
- Living off the residuals Mark Hamill
- Hitler-moustache Obi-Wan
- Openly gay C3P0
- George Lucas with bags of money
- Billy Dee Williams with Malt Liquor Action
- The Force
- Identical twins of every character
- A wookie taking a crap
- Han Job
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- Michael J. Fox
- Two cults of children, locked in eternal struggle, at the same coffee stand you were at two minutes ago
- Two cults of children who murder people, locked in eternal struggle
- A cult of children that murder people
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- All the starving people
- Miraculous 2nd coat of wax on my Thunderbird
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- Grover Cleveland
- Beastly Muff
- Pubic Zirconium
- Spelling Bea
- Busty Brian
- Hot Karla
- Synnamin Rollz
- World’s Best Grandma
- Steele Reserrv
- Krabb Kakes
- Karrot Pealer
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- Slinky
- Broken stencil, letters A-J
- Hairbrush whittled out of a potato
- Stretch of shag carpeting that once had 7-Up poured on it but has now dried
- Complete set of 32 ginsu knives
- Baseball cap
- Half-pound of spaghetti
- Another dude’s even
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- Dick Gum: Gum for Your Dick
- Dickorette
- The toothless gums of your sexy grandmother (fellating me)
- Bazooka Johnspn
- Juicy Fruitbasket
- Dicklets
- Doublewidth
- XXXtra
- Big Red
- Humple Yum
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- Break her apart and put your person-sized dick on trial for murder
- Require attendants to carry your oxen-sized member on a tarp
- Suck the rest of the blood from your body with your blistering red penis
- Embarass yourself in public
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