Top Ten Warning Signs Your Date is a Date-Rapist

  1. He carries pills in his pocket, but when you ask him what they are for, he says something that sounds like “raping you,” then stammers a lot and finally ends up saying something feeble and unconvincing that rhymes with “raping you”
  2. About to give you drink, then shouts “Look over there! Away from my hands or pockets!”
  3. He asks you to wear handcuffs during sex, only he doesn’t really ask you, and you never agreed to have sex
  4. She likes breaking stereotypes
  5. You discover video tapes of him having sex with you, passed out, and your shirt in the video is the same one you wore on that night when you got date-raped
  6. He is very rich due to his being heir to the Max Factor fortune
  7. He mentions how he finds it really hot when chicks pass out
  8. The back doors of his car have no handles on the inside, and it’s not a police car
  9. When someone shouts “Hey, Date Rapist” in the bar, he starts to turn around, but then nonchalantly tries to turn it into a yawn
  10. He is constantly trying to date-rape you