On Saturday, in an attempt to establish positive ties with the Jewish community, Mel Gibson held a barbeque at his Malibu home.
Leaders of the Jewish Community and Anti-Discrimination groups attended the event in good spirits. “It’s always a good … Read More
In a press release Monday evening, your Asian roommate made the official statement that the infuriatingly bad Chinese Hip Hop music constantly playing from his laptop would continue indefinitely.
“This decision has been thought over carefully, and there was a … Read More
In what has been described by local police as a, “racially provoked verbal assault,” a local Pot was accused of calling a nearby Kettle, “black.” A fellow Kettle commented, “I thought we’d come a long way since the days of … Read More
Local vagrant Patches Wilkinson was declared a historic landmark by the Berkeley City Council last night. “For the past twenty four years, Mr. Wilkinson has brightened the corner of Dwight and Dana with his presence, and provided much-needed diversity to … Read More
Paleontologists and researchers recently uncovered hints of a new species of dinosaur. While no concrete evidence of its existence has been found, scientists postulate that the “Clitaurus” evolved millions of years ago, and might still exist on the earth today … Read More
Congratulations on obtaining a copy of the Heuristic Squelch. Unfortunately, we regret to inform you that by accepting this issue, you too have fallen under the curse of a mysterious Native American shaman. Sorry, our bad. We’d like to explain … Read More
