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top ten | The Heuristic Squelch
More people that listen to rap music, less people that can understand it.
“Yo Quiero Taco Bell” Chihuahua replaced by “Yo Quiero Apple Pie” Labrador.
Influx of tornadoes, trailer parks appear on Memorial Glade.
Native American Studies becomes “Injun Studies.” … Read More
Reebok Pumps
The scutellosaurus
Hypercolor T-shirts
Columbus Day
Earth Day
Slap bracelets
<I>The Love Boat</I> (What? DAMN!)
The Soviet Union
Parachute pants
Hitler
Prohibition
Diversity at Cal
<I>Fame!</I>
<I>Police Academy</I> movies
Slavery
… Read More
There’s a fire
You want to beat off.
Your pants are on fire.
To pet the Dalmatian.
Mynocks
lt doesn’t matter, as long as you did it By Any Means Necessary.
Because it’s your God given right. What are you? … Read More
Flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong
Waiting for Godot
A Street Punk Named Desire
Venetian Merchant
Security Monitor
Karamazov brother
The Last Mohican
Dead Salesman
Men
Mice
Translating at the English Embassy
Au … Read More
Biggest Bomb with SNL Cast Member
Best Prosthetic Penis
Kevin Bacon Lifetime Achievement Award
Biggest Kevin Costner Failure
Best Samuel L. Bronkowitz Production
Most Predictable Ending
Best Disney Perversion of a Classic Fairy Tale or Historical Event
Best of the … Read More
Hitler
Julia Child
Jenny Craig 11 months of the year
The Notorious B.I.G.
Cookie Monster
Kenyon Jones
You, Barry Kurtz, you
BobaFett
Joe Eskenazi
Fiona Apple
… Read More
Tysberg Address
Your shit together
Da Fuck Out
A life
Funky
Down
In line
Bent
Out and push
High, Stupid, and AIDS
… Read More
Sorority sisters found out she was literate.
Writer’s cramp
Chancellor Berdahl was impotent (politically, we mean)
Depleted ova
She’s not ready for a relationship. It’s just moving too fast.
She got fired after casually commenting that Joe Eskinazi wasn’t funny … Read More
I’m leaving you Alex.
Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?
Where is the keg, bra?
What is the frequency Kenneth?
Where is the beef?
Who is scruffy looking?
Whaddup?
What does this button do?
What’s love got to … Read More
Center, Hollywood Squares
Paying his American Express Bill
Cal Football Coach
Psychic Friend
Heroin Addict
White House Intern
Bad Actor
Bounty Hunter
Girl’s Gym Teacher
Rabbi
… Read More