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Hazing
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Beat the turd
- Helluva coffee break
- 2000 Gushes
- “If you think it tastes bad, wait’ll the smell hits you!”
- Head on the head
- Plop-n-Splooge
- Blowjob plus
- Blumpkin
- Hershey windstorm
Tag Archives: top ten
Top Ten TV Shows About Pigs
- Cops
- Dawson’s Corkscrewed Cock
- The Pig is Right
- Win Ben Swine’s Money
- Ally McSqueal
- Pigs Say the Darnedest Things
- Swinefeld
- When Pigs Attack
- The Snouter Limits
- Hoof’s the Boss?
Top Ten Restaurants Owned by Roscoe
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Peanut Butter and Sand
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Grits and Ass
- Kibbles and Bits
- Catgut and Rubber Cement
- Gin and Juice
- Booze and Pills
- Vegemite and Haggis
- Toothpaste and Orange Juice
- Nuts and Gum
- Chicken and Waffles
Top Ten Pornographic Industrial Bands
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Skinny Puppy with a Penis In It
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Front 242 Centimeters
- Ram-stein
- EYELOVEBESTIALITY
- Blowhaus
- Gravity Sucks My Cock
- Prick
- KBDSM
- Stabbing Breastward
- Ten Inch Turds (TIT)
Top Ten Failed New Fall Sitcoms
- Frasier
- The C+ Team
- OJ’s House
- Molested by an Angel
- Me and My Syphilitic Uncle
- The Good Samaritans
- The Corey and Corey Show
- The Corey Haim Show
- The Corey Feldman Show
- Three Washed-Up Actors and a Child Star
Top Ten New Products We Don’t Understand
- Red Bull
- Virgin Cola
- Gravity in a Can
- Plasma clouds
- Mexican Pizza
- The Infinite Dress
- Windows 98
- The wheel
- The Electric Goo Razor
- Hard Jeans
Top Ten Ways to Celebrate Thanksgiving
- Gratify yourself at the kids’ table.
- Paint eggs and hide them.
- Get a keg and hire the Spin Doctors.
- Blow all your money on Quaker prostitutes
- Say “You’re welcome.”
- Stuff Grandma.
- Think about stuff that sucks and how it could
Top Ten Ways to Make the Stock Market Go Up
- Go back to the gold standard
- American Brides for pennies on the dollar!
- Viagra
- More blue chips, less buffalo chips
- World War III
- Destabilize more third-world economies
- Get Alan Greenspan laid
- Lower everything else
- Helicopter
- Elevator
Top Ten Rejected Titles to “It’s 3AM” by Matchbox 20
- It’s 6AM, We’re Still Laying Out the Squelch Because the Fucking Computer Crashed and We Ended Up Spending $25 on Adobe Technical Support Talking to Nancy, a Midwest Dyke Who Told Us the Likelihood of Recovering Our File Was Hopeless
Top Ten Things Overheard at the Last ASUC Senate Meeting
- “Can we have donuts at the meetings like the Squelch does? And hookers, too!”
- “I’m feeling very representative today.”
- “All right, I’m drunk. Let’s get started.”
- “I move…my bowels. Oops!”
- “Of course they’ll come. We’ve got Kennedy!”
- Monkey noises
- “I
