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Peanut Butter and Sand
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Grits and Ass
- Kibbles and Bits
- Catgut and Rubber Cement
- Gin and Juice
- Booze and Pills
- Vegemite and Haggis
- Toothpaste and Orange Juice
- Nuts and Gum
- Chicken and Waffles
Tag Archives: top ten
Top Ten Pornographic Industrial Bands
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Skinny Puppy with a Penis In It
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Front 242 Centimeters
- Ram-stein
- EYELOVEBESTIALITY
- Blowhaus
- Gravity Sucks My Cock
- Prick
- KBDSM
- Stabbing Breastward
- Ten Inch Turds (TIT)
Top Ten New Berkeley Street Vendor Products
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T-Shirts Made from Babies
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Baby T-Shirts
- Desperate Sixteen-Year-Old Runaway Girls Looking for Father Figures
- Stolen Dogs
- Snow Sticks
- Tie-Dye Maxi Pads
- Lead Pipes
- Smack Brownies
- Crazy Yanosh’s Crap in a Can
- Bolivian Virgins
Top Ten Alternative Birth Control Methods
- Non-alcoholic beer
- Smoothie with a free nonoxynol-9 supplement
- Not having sex
- Mountain Dew
- Yoshua sandwiched between you and your partner
- I Can’t Believe It’s Not A Diaphragm!
- Melted Mentos molded into a cervical plug
- Ninja Death Cage
- Cement
- Stop, drop,
Top Ten Least Popular Dance Steps
- The Terrified Croatian
- Disco
- The Uncontrolled Bladder
- The Grand Jury Jive
- The Sorority Girl Split
- Rhombus Dancing
- Hide the Stain
- The Dislocated Shoulder
- The Gettysburgh
- Walk with an Erection
Top Ten “Saved by the Bell” Spin-Offs
- Lisa Sucks. I Hate Lisa. Let’s Kill Lisa.
- Zach Morris Sucks My Ass
- Kelly Kapowski Bangs the Entire Cast of 90210
- Slater, Texas Ranger
- The Elizabeth Berkeley Full-Frontal Nudity Half Hour
- Saved by Yoshua
- Saved by “Ctrl+S”
- Worthless, Mind-Rotting Crap
Top Ten Things Our Place Kicker Can Do
- Kick the ball through the invisible goal posts just to the right of the visible ones
- Jump, Jive, and Wail
- Fuck up Lucy’s shit
- Cunnilingus
- Pick his nose
- Break Dance
- Play Starcraft (with his toes!)
- Binge drink
- Jacks
- Racquetball
Top Ten Advantages of Having a Giant Tapeworm
- All the benefits of bulimia without staining your teeth.
- No need for leeches.
- A tapeworm is man’s second best friend.
- If you’re Jewish, you can eat pork.
- Cheaper than getting reamed.
- Tapeworms are recordable, unlike CD worms.
- Not as bad
Top Ten Better Uses for the Space Allotted to a Daily Californian Column
- Scratch ‘n sniff Cal offensive line
- Origami
- Always QuickWrap<sup>TM</sup>
- CalPIRG rant
- Turkey sandwich (mmmmmm….)
- Place to wipe boogers
- MCAT answers
- More “No Exit” cartoons
- Stolen credit card numbers
- Doodle square
Top Ten Little-Known Mythological Beings
- Polyphetus
- Saddest Motherfucker Alive
- The Fine-Ass Cal Cheerleader
- The Sascrotch
- The Peg-your-sis
- Medusa Oblongata
- The Sphinxter
- The Centard
- The Eunuchorn
- The Leperchaun
