Top Ten Alternative Birth Control Methods

  1. Non-alcoholic beer
  2. Smoothie with a free nonoxynol-9 supplement
  3. Not having sex
  4. Mountain Dew
  5. Yoshua sandwiched between you and your partner
  6. I Can’t Believe It’s Not A Diaphragm!
  7. Melted Mentos molded into a cervical plug
  8. Ninja Death Cage
  9. Cement
  10. Stop, drop, and roll