Fudge
The Presidency of the United States during a time of peril when the country actually needs a president committed to protecting the freedom we cherish instead of pushing aregressive tax structure unheard of since when child labor was considered … Read More
He carries pills in his pocket, but when you ask him what they are for, he says something that sounds like “raping you,” then stammers a lot and finally ends up saying something feeble and unconvincing that rhymes with “raping … Read More
Michael J. Fox
Two cults of children, locked in eternal struggle, at the same coffee stand you were at two minutes ago
Two cults of children who murder people, locked in eternal struggle
A cult of children that murder people … Read More
All the starving people
Miraculous 2nd coat of wax on my Thunderbird
… Read More
Amit Tamir
Smurf socks smurf
Subtle Butler
Baal’s slab
Drab draft
Campanile C
Poopy
La Val’s
Amish Shrimp
Yves’ racecar: Chevy!
… Read More
Grow a thin mustache
Smoke cigarettes and look cool
Pop that kid’s damn balloon
Tell every French person you meet, “Gee, how ’bout that Maginot Line?”
Fall in love with a beast
Try to step in the exact same place … Read More
About Slit
Fellate Me if You Can
My Big Fat Greek Wedding Night
The Hours and Hours of Sex
About a Boytoy
Spirited Lay
The 12-inch Uncircumcised Pianist
Gangbangs of New York
… Read More
Free porn!
Being an egg loaner not lucrative enough
Lower your cholesterol
So you can experience the joy of being a donor
You’re an Olympic runner and they’re weighing you down
Beats being a leg donor
You’re tired of seeing … Read More
Take-yo-Sushi Biatch
Crepes-a-Poo-Poo
Chez P+Anis
Juice Appeal (but open)
Mildly Intelligent Alec’s
Kip’s Underage Caf+A
Morbidly Obese Slice
El Burrito
Frogurt Shark
Slop Dog
… Read More
You paid Stanford $120,000
You’re Kyle Boller and it’s opposite day
You need to go star in a late-60’s movie with Ann Bancroft
Like Stalin, your third five-year plan was wildly successful
Cause you can’t go home and you can’t … Read More
