- “My daddy left home when I was three / He came back home later that day, but still”
- “Because you’re mine / I walk across the street when instructed by the sign”
- “Daddy sang bass / Other daddy sang tenor”
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- African American Studies 11/Latin American Studies 9 (cross-listed): Why You’re Too Lazy to Steal
- Comparative Literature 2: Chaucer’s Revenge
- Physics 142C: The Physics of Cum Trajectory
- Landscape Architecture 39H: You Don’t Have to Take My Word for It, You KNOW
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- Cheating on your ugly girlfriend
- Buying a Toyota Prius and using the gas you saved to burn forests
- Reading to deaf people
- Killing an anti-Pope
- Aborting Hitler
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- Where did the last four hours go?
- Could somebody really get aroused by this?
- How can I harness the awesome power of Immortality Cubes?
- Is “analfisting” one word or two?
- How would Sonic’s marriage to Princess Toadstool really go?
- What
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- You played a retarded guy, but it was a documentary
- Your credit: “Assistant to Mr. Top”
- The title of your movie replaces a word that sounds like “monkey” with the word “monkey”
- “Man’s Head Exploding” flipbook not technically a movie
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- Stand on him and urinate
- Get him a job in Hollywood
- Become international celebrity, get cancer, make baldness trendy
- Read something
- Be a pro-Semite, whatever that is
- Make yarmulkes out of Nazi flags
- Bank
- Vote for someone who isn’t Buchanan
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- Tangerines and Acid Trips, My Battle with Robots
- Super Gook 2005
- Still Better than Creed
- The Yellow Album
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- Susan Sarandon Takes a Dump on This Guy in the Back of a Fiat
- There’s No Dodging Eric Gagne’s Pitcher of Cum
- George Michael’s Coming in His GMC
- Minnie Driver and the Mini Driver
- Mercedes Ruehl Benz Over
- Robert Gouchevrolay
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- One leg at a time
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