- “Mmmm… ohhh… mmmm… do it baby…”
- “Would you like to go to Bible study?”
- “No. You really don’t want that class. Oh, no!“
- “Aquarius: You will enter into a long-term commitment today. Assess your strengths and wea
- “Your registration
… Read More
- Nirvana – “’Smells Like Teen Spirit’ Remixes”
- Snoop Doggy Dogg – “Hooked on Phonics”
- Madonna – “Dining In, Eating Out”
- Garth Brooks – “Garth Garth Baby”
- Michael Jackson – “This One’s for the Children”
- Techno Rave Masters – “Unplugged”
- Hammer
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- Bob Dole says so.
- Olympic figure skaters wear full body armor to practice.
- Kindergartners outgun their teachers in New York public schools.
- New Kids on the Block concerts sell out due to guns-for-tickets
swap.
- Disneyworld attendance in Florida drops .01%
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- Any girl who is “not feeling fresh today”
- The Energizer Bunny
- Larry H. Parker
- The Magnavox dog
- Sally Struthers trying to persuade people to feed the children
- The Pizza Hut Bigfoot delivery dork
- Russ from the Lake Edna KFC
- The
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- Gyne-Lotrimin
- Ben-Gay
- Preparation H
- KY Jelly
- Clearasil
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- Write a goofy book about the future, but make everything vague
- Watch Seinfeld reruns when they were new
- Bring back aluminum cans used before recycling was invented and get
rich (Yahoo!)
- Return to the good ol’ days of love and
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- Leave
- Discuss grade with drunk professor
- Make lewd gestures with beer bottles
- Train house dog to pump keg
- Pour beer on girls’ T- shirts
- Mumble to yourself and look tough
- Replace drunk people’s beer with urine
- Wander around in drunken
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- Using hand puppets for non-medicinal purposes
- Abusive application of hair mousse
- Throwing cabbage at foreigners
- Calling a judge “sweet hips”
- Panhandling with a pitchfork
- Spreading lice to a police officer
- Performing unauthorized brain transplants
- Imitating Jermaine Jackson
- Getting married to
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- Pretend to be security guard and arrest people for buying textbooks they know
they’ll never use
- Yell “Fire! Fire! Oh, never mind, it’s just in Nutritional Science.”
- Test “human domino” theory
- Incite book burning
- Reading for first four weeks of
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- Angst and Alienation To Go
- Cafe Spam Delight
- Pseudo Intellectual Espresso
- Cafe Obnoxio
- Mocha n’ Grits
… Read More
