- My doctor told me anal sex was the best thing to make it heal fast.
- Think of it as Pez(tm) dispenser with a really big head.
- Keep looking, it’s got to be in there somewhere.
- Get a load of this.
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- EuroBerkeley
- Castle Greyskull
- UCB International Airport
- Tunnel connecting Etcheverry and Dwinelle, complete with Disneyland-
esque Peoplemover(tm)
- Soda Hall
- Chancellor Tien’s Underground Fortress
- The Peach Pit
- Stairway to Heaven
- Thunderdome
- Virtual Dwinelle
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- Go on to a stimulating career in management consulting.
- Write IOUs on it.
- Use as a small blanket for those chilly winter nights on the
streets.
- Use as toilet paper on days Daily Cal isn’t printed.
- Use reverse side to
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- Star Trek: Into the Unemployment Office
- Bones McCoy, M.D.
- Jordie’s Tool-Time
- Datahue
- Kirk and Picard at the movies
- Klingon Kiddie Corner
- Farengi Shopping Network
- Romulan Rap Session
- Deanna Troi’s Psychic Friends Network
- Deep Six-9
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- High Jump
- Synchronized Spliffing
- Bowl Vault
- Jamaican Bobsledding
- Bong Water Polo
- Hemptathalon
- Bowling
- 50m Hash
- JAH-velin throw
- Bong Jump
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- “Chunk”
- Lounge couch has sentimental value.
- They say this year’s Freshman crop is the best since ’86.
- Can never outgrow cheap thrills in co-ed bathroom.
- Now your choice of Drug or Drug-free.
- They’re earthquake safe.
- You’re from Bosnia and Unit
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- Come up with flattering ways to describe most recent Cal football loss.
- Invent goofy personals ads.
- Laugh about Josh’s hair.
- Try to find humor in NO EXIT cartoon.
- Go back to their regular jobs at “Hooked on Phonics”.
- Practice showing
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- Get your money’s worth at Sizzler.
- Get paid $30 to lose the weight (and eat anything you want!).
- 2 seats for the price of one.
- Free lifetime PriceClub membership.
- Good excuse for small looking penis.
- Earn extra cash working as
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- Wanna hear a good joke? There are three guys on a plane, a Black, a Jew, and an Italian…
- Shit, we’re out of wiper fluid!
- You guys ever see “Fearless” with that Jeff Bridges guy?
- Stewardess, another Scotch please.
- I
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- Your RA.
- Pretend you are a narc.
- Call (900) numbers.
- Telekinesis.
- Square dancing.
- Snort Dipsticks and run around on a sugar high.
- Pet-sitting for police drug sniffing dogs.
- Sniffing others’ clothes after they return from Co-op party.
- Virtual kegger.
- Get
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