- Manifest Destiny.
- Find magic voodoo potion for Hillary’s hair.
- Clinton itching for Caribbean harem.
- To release pent-up frustration from health-care fiasco.
- To stave off impending invasion of U.S.
- We’re bigger than they are.
- Re-assert world dominance through crushing defeat of entire crack 23-member Haitian military.
- To insure Republican victory in ’96.
- It’s closer than Bosnia.
- Need island retreat to keep Gore daughters tan ‘n’ succulent.
