- Genital Contact
- George of the Jungle and His 12 Inch Penis
- Nothing To Splooge
- Ulee’s Golden Shower
- Pants/Off
- Herpules
- Anaconda
- My Best Friend’s Orgy
- Batman is Bobbin’
- Men in Black Spandex
Tag Archives: top ten
Top Ten Surprises Chancellor Berdahi Brought From Texas
-
Lunatic with big ears wants to be ASUC President.
-
“Homeless” replaced with “varmints.”
- New ropin’ team.
- Doe lawn now Doe beef ranch.
- New “Crispy Hair Studies” department.
- Sproul preachers make excellent rodeo announcers.
- The Pinto on blocks in front of
Top Ten New Target Groups For Affirmative Action
- Hookers
- Thundercats
- Hanson
- Saved by fhe Bell cast members
- John Tesh
- Drug-crazed Nazis
- Angry white males
- Orphaned princes
- Rapists
- Paparazzi
Top Ten Alternative Names for Valentine’s Day
- Vaseline’s Day
- Love – is – temporary – but – STDs – are – forever Day
- Relent – to – his – request – for – anal – sex Day
- There’s – good – reasons – why – you’re –
Top Ten Things to Masturbate With
- Guilt
- Your Mama
- Mother Teresa
- An audience
- Cheese Grater
- Zona Rosa SuperPork burrito
- Greasy Chancellor
- Greasy Bike Chain
- Attitude
- Public Statue
Top Ten Rejected Plastic Surgeries
- Regis Philbin
- Goatee-ectomy
- Mono-Brow reconstruction
- The Jackson Family
- Lee Press-On Goiter
- Love Handle implant
- Female circumcision
- Uvula bifuraction
- Robert Implant
- Ass hair implants
Top Ten Features We’d Like to See on the New Macintosh
- Ctrl L, S, and D (gets you high)
- Command E (ejaculates floppy)
- Command P (orders you pizza)
- Command O (brings you Arnold Schwarzenegger)
- Alt Y (Psychoanalyzes you)
- Control U (gets you a domineering spouse)
- Shift command A- (Finish your paper
Top Ten Books in the Bible You’ve Never Heard of
- Shaft Goes to the Holyland
- That Bitch Better Have My Money
- Proud Parent of a Gay Son
- The books of Matthew, Mark, Olivia Newton John
- Mighty Morphin Power Apostles
- Jesus’s years as a Grateful Dead roadie by St. Albert Goldman
Top Ten Words Not To Use On Your Resume
- Der Weinerschnitzell
- Pending appeal
- Performed abortions
- Democrat
- Prozac ™
- Infected
- Cunnilingus
- Goat fetish
- Conviction
- Stupid-jerk-boss
Top Ten Things to Do After Giving Head
- Swallow.
- Look in the mirror and say, “Gee, I’m a glazed donut!”.
- Introduce yourself.
- Exit restroom, return to class.
- Tell the officer that it will never happen again.
- Make sure not to leave until letter of recommendation is signed.
- Return
