Are You There, Mega-Vibe 6000?

It’s Me, Margaret…

_First Date _
Margaret: …then he said he could never marry me. I guess I’ve been afraid of a serious relationship ever since.

Mega: Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz.

Margaret: Ohh thank you. You’re right, I do deserve better.

Mega: Bzzzz.

Margaret: I’ve had a great time too. I feel like you’ve really gotten to know me. On the inside.

Taking Home to Parents
Dad: He could stand to clean up a little.

Mom: Steven!

Margaret: Dad, you just don’t like him because he’s from Japan.

Mom: Besides, Mega seems nice. He’s fairly quiet, and isn’t abrasive.

Dad: Yeah, but that mother-of-pearl coloring makes him seem way too effeminate.

Margaret: Dad!

[buzzing off in the distance]

Mom: We better get him before he scares the dog.

The Honeymoon

[sound of battery package being opened]


The Affair
Margaret: I’ve found someone else. Someone who makes me feel more… comfortable.

Mega: Bzz…?

Margaret: His name is Magician’s Rabbit. His anal attachment is able to give me something special that you are, well, missing.

Mega: Bzz…!

Margaret: Put down that chair, you’re acting crazy!

[crashing, screaming, then silence]

Mega: Bzz? Bzz? BZZZZZZZZZZ!!