- Light his farts on the tomb of the unknown soldier
- Paralyze Bob Dole’s other arm
- Three words: Vice President Hanson
- End all of his speeches with “You mutherfuckers are gonna PAY!”
- Make love to his wife
- Lower taxes and reduce
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- Endorsed by the Daily Cat.
- Didn’t stock enough inflatable aliens.
- $1.00 Schlotzky’s Pizza is better than $1.00 clothes.
- One can only own so many copies of “Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em.”
- No one would pay even $1.00 for such worthless
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- Pimp Wheels
- Olestra Surprise
- Crack Ahoy!
- Tagalogs
- Tossed Salad
- Yeasty Beasties
- Sex Sandwich
- Don’ Eat ‘Dose
- Shin Splints
- Samoans
- Pappy Pap Smears
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- My dad says my brother gives better head than I do.
- Ben Franklin invented electricity.
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- Swamp Ass
- The Fall of the Old Republic
- Casa Z
- Impotence
- Mentos
- Batman and Robin
- Seinfeld’s cancellation
- The Republican Party
- Dwinelle
- The Back Street Boys
- Cal sports
- Herpes
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- Chia ate-a my pizza
- Kia Sephia
- Chia Chia Bang Bang
- And Chong
- Pregnancy Test
- Jesus
- Chia Rodriguez
- Chia Guevara
- Sinead O’Conner
- Ed Asner
- Pubes
- Don King
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- It’s the Dagobah System
- The Little Department That Could
- Smoke-easy’s
- Three words: Golden Bear Chili
- Financial Aid Office communicating with alien overlord
- Swamp gas
- 80’s rock videos being filmed in there.
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- Russian Brides for Pennies on the Dollar
- Re: Dundant Top Ten
- Re: efer
- Re: Gis and Kathy Lee
- Re: bar
- Re: turn of the Jedi
- Re: Me Fa So La Tee Doe
- Re: straining order
- Re: eeecola
- Re: Re: <FWD>
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- There’s a fire
- You want to beat off.
- Your pants are on fire.
- To pet the Dalmatian.
- Mynocks
- lt doesn’t matter, as long as you did it By Any Means Necessary.
- Because it’s your God given right. What are you?
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- Flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong
- Waiting for Godot
- A Street Punk Named Desire
- Venetian Merchant
- Security Monitor
- Karamazov brother
- The Last Mohican
- Dead Salesman
- Men
- Mice
- Translating at the English Embassy
- Au
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