“Hyphy Movement” Meets Hyphy Resistance, Thousands Dead

The infectious spread of a popular Bay Area-based hip-hop genre, known as the Hyphy Movement, escalated to a bloody climax yesterday, as tensions between extremist Pro-Hyphy Reformers and Purist Anti-Hyphy Resistance erupted in brutal combat. Surviving eye witnesses report that Anti-Hyphy Guerilla Insurgents ambushed the Hyphy Movement’s Honor Guard Battalion as they ghost-rid their whips into rebel territory, hoping to convert the natives to their cause.

“If Our Glorious Hyphy Revolution is ever to enlighten the non-believers of the world, we must maintain tactical momentum and crush the Underground Anti-Hyphy Dissenters. Any more Hyphy Failures like yesterday’s Hyphy Massacre and the Movement will suffer hella consequences, yadadamean?” said Curtis Green, Berkeley High School sophomore.

Hearing this, many Bay Area residents replied, “…What?”