Oh, that’s hilarious! You really are Rick James, bitch. What? OKAY! Nothing irks me more than people who refer to the “Little John” sketch. First of all, he’s LIL JON, not Little John. Little John was one of Robin Hood’s Merry Men. Lil Jon is a dirrrty southern rapper who likes to get crunked. Other differences of note:
Little John first became friends with Robin Hood, says the legend, when Robin tried to cross a bridge and was challenged by John to a battle of quarterstaffs. Lil Jon once said “All skeet skeet motherfuckers. All skeet skeet god damn.”
According to folklore, Little John was famous for being seven feet tall. Lil Jon often feels seven feet tall when he’s high on PCP.
Little John was buried at Hathersage in Derbyshire, England. Lil Jon doesn’t know where England is located, how to spell it, or what a map is.
Just as Eskimos have 30 different words for snow, Lil Jon knows many more synonyms for “vagina” and “intoxicated” than Little John.
Little John is written of as being a skilled player of the lute, a stringed medieval musical instrument. Lil Jon’s songs often feature whistles, which are musical instruments in the same way that a crying baby is a musical instrument.
Little John, along with Robin of Loxley and his merry band, carried the hopes of the blighted rural peasantry of England upon their noble shoulders. Lil Jon makes songs about banging strippers.
Little John’s secretary was named Kennedy, and Lil Jon’s secretary was named Lincoln. Weird, huh?
