- You’re just coming to grips with your hobosexuality
- You’re protesting clean, safe sex with attractive people
- You’re a member of CalPIRG
- He said he was a doctor and he swore he’d call you sometime
- You’re from Stanford, and it’s better than what you’ve got over there
- They don’t have very many teeth, mostly
- You’re conducting an experiment to see if insanity can be transmitted through dirty rough sex
- Really, are you having sex with anybody else
- When the revolution comes, they won’t kill you
- It’s cheaper than throwing change at them
