Frat Boy Makes Discovery During Spring Cleaning

Spring cleaning brings up all sorts of hidden treasures, but none were as surprising as one found in Phi Kappa Tau’s hallway.

During the cleaning, frat boy Tim Shook found a single-handled broom. The broom, which was described as being wooden, hard, and useful, was found beneath three feet of crushed beer cans, half-eaten Cup-o-Noodles, racial intolerance, overly-repeated Dave Chappelle jokes, and a passed-out sorority girl. The broom was apparently lost two years prior during a spring-cleaning turned keg-party.

In light of the find, Shook proposed celebration in the form of a spring-cleaning keg party, saying, “Yeah, I’m Rick James bitch.” While drunkenly standing atop a Bud Light keg, Shook nominated the broom for the prestigious king of the keg position, saying “Yeah, I’m Rick James bitch.” The broom was lost during the party.