- The old bulb burnt out.
- You don’t want to piss on the floor.
- You’re in the segregated south.
- Houseboy!
- You’re an ethnic minority and/or holder of an unpopular job description.
- You’re tired of masturbating.
- You’re Thomas Edison and think you’re really fucking great.
- You’re the only male in an office full of women who make you do all the goddamn repairs no matter how easy or trivial.
- You’re two electrons and listening to Barry White.
- You’re blind and bored.
