- Head implosion is so 1998
- You’re in space, and although you do have your helmet, it’s useless because you are six years old and made it yourself out of cardboard
- You filled your head with popcorn kernels and then heated yourself to between 400 and 600 degrees Fahrenheit, the temperature at which popcorn pops
- You’re in space and a grizzly bear stole your helmet
- You’re drinking Coke while eating Pop Rocks, gunpowder, and tiny sticks of lit dynamite
- Your head slowed to below 50 miles per hour
- It’s inside a vagina
- Because that fucking bullshit Staind song is on every radio station and music network
- You sneezed while covering your nose and mouth
- You’re in space and you forgot to wear your helmet
