Top Ten Ways to Catch the Loch Ness Monster

  1. Dress up as a sexy female Loch Ness monster, keeping you true non-monster identity secret until the
  2. French kiss someone who already has the Loch Ness monster.
  3. Turn the world upside down, and handily catch the monster as it falls.
  4. With honey, rather than vinegar
  5. Paint a fake tunnel onto the Loch wall
  6. Pour arsenic in the Loch. Monster dies. Go home.
  7. Pour salt in the Loch, and continue pouring salt in the Loch until the monster floats to the surfac
  8. In a really big baseball glove
  9. With Loch Ness monster paper
  10. Send him a Crushlink email