Top Ten Benefits of AC Transit

  1. Hookers, firearms, and Dreds – Oh my!
  2. Graffiti keeps you up to date on local gang activity.
  3. Transit and transients go hand in hand.
  4. All the lice (head, pubic, etc.) you can host!
  5. Correct change gets you a souvenir crack pipe… no wait, that’s on BART.
  6. Who can resist a 127-year-old man telling you the graphic details of his prostate cancer?
  7. A varied array of smelling delights.
  8. You can pick up handy recipes for corn, human flesh, welfare cheese and much, much more.
  9. One gets a much better understanding of the wonders of urine through hands-on (feet-on)
  10. Pre-teens laughing at your clothes builds character.