Freshman Carefully Crafts “Male Slut” Reputation

According to the floormates of Kole Tammar, the Unit 2 freshman has been dropping increasingly obvious hints into casual conversation that he is, in actuality, a male slut that is willing to engage in no-strings-attached, sport-fucking type sex with female co-eds.

“I figure, what the heck, it’s college and girls just want to have some fun,” explained Tammar. “And don’t relationships suck? Way too much work,” he awkwardly segued.

Friends have noticed the change in recent months. “He used to be kinda quiet at parties, but now it’s totally different,” noted roommate Dan Ford. “Now he cruises up to girls and he’s all, ‘Hey, my name’s Kole. Maybe you’ve heard of me. From your girlfriends. Whom I might have had casual sex with.’ I even saw him purposely drop a condom at a party one time. He’s all, ‘Oops.’ What a tard.”

Tammar plans to continue on his path to creating a reputation for fun, purely sexual relationships. He mused, “If that doesn’t work, maybe I’ll just write a thinly-veiled allusion in the guise of a news report in the campus humor publication.”