U.S. Troops Not Exactly Sure Where They Are

Yesterday U.S. troops stormed a hostile Iraqi city only to discover that they weren’t even sure where they were.

According to one soldier, “Shit it’s hot. Are we in Kabul or Baghdad? Whatever, let’s get ready to bomb something.”

According to Centcom spokesperson Leslie Hargrove, “Last we heard, they were somewhere in the Middle East heading either east or west. We can’t confirm anything at this point, not even the point at which the confirming can’t be done.”

Many people believe that this confusion is directly related to the lack of English-language road signs.

Battalion Commander Michael “Mike” Jones wonders, “why the fuck are these signs in Arabic? I thought that legally, street signs are supposed to be in English. I mean, we won World War II, didn’t we?”

His only recollection of the journey was one lone sign deep in the desert.

“I saw one sign some miles back that said ‘Now Entering Iran.’ What the fuck is Iran anyways? Where’s Saddam?”