Investigators were briefly baffled by a mysterious suicide Thursday. A man had hung himself from a rafter in the ceiling– without any obvious stool to stand on and kick away. “We were kind of puzzled for, like, 30 seconds,” said Inspector Holohan, “then we noticed the pool of water underneath him and were like ‘Oh, hey, melting block of ice, like in Two-Minute Mysteries.”’ Two-Minute Mysteries was a popular book of short “missing clue” detective stories for children. However, according to the Inspector, some mysteries remain unresolved. “Was this guy a fan of Two-Minute Mysteries and wanted to re-enact it or something? Or did he really think standing on a big block of ice was a good way to end it? There’s plenty of stools in his house, so that wasn’t an issue.” The Inspector then turned the body around to check his answer.