In a violent display of proletariat rage, members of the Berkeley chapter of the radical Socialist group the Spartacus League publicly smashed a floral-themed glass vase yesterday on Market Street in San Francisco. The vase, according to a demonstration leader that identified himself as “Georgio”, symbolized and approximated the forces and inherent evils of capitalism, and therefore needed to be smashed. The vase was purchased at Wal-Mart.
A visibly excited Georgio was not the least bit apologetic for his vase-smashing tactics. “Hey,” he stated. “We’re here to smash capitalism and introduce to the masses to a Trotskyist society.” When asked about the choice of a four-dollar vase as a target of class-warfare, Georgio explained that “seeing as how [he doesn’t] live by the imposed structure of capitalism, that was the extent to which [he] could participate in the system.” “Fascists,” he added.
The event was attended by a total of twelve people, all active members of the Spartacus League. When asked to comment, a nearby bum on the corner of Market and Geary told the protestors to clean up the mess, goddamit.