Stylish Slogan Sasses Out College Campus

UC Berkeley students were totally sassed out by Chemical Engineering major Jenny Parker last Tuesday, when she sported a t-shirt bearing the slogan “If you don’t want attitude, stop talking to me.”

Students reported that Parker, formerly known as the introvert who broke curves in her classes, was “totally sassy.” “That shirt proves that she has attitude,” said passerby Sara Elliot. “I’ll consider myself warned.” The oversized Hanes Beefy-T reportedly was worn tucked into tapered jeans, with the sleeves rolled up. Parker had purchased it the day before at a local t-shirt store.

“I was on my way back to the dorms and I decided to stop by the T-shirt Orgy. I was just about to purchase that ‘Hookt on fonix wurked fer me’ shirt with the wacky spelling, but then I saw this one and it just spoke to me.”

Peers took note of the attitude Parker was displaying. Classmate Tom Mills reports, “I wanted to ask Jenny what the O-Chem homework was, but when I saw the warning on her shirt, I just got all intimidated and decided to e-mail my TA instead.”

Parker sees other witty slogan tees in her future. Potential sassy slogans include “Slow Thinkers Keep Right” and “Talk To The Hand,” with an accompanying drawing of an actual hand.