The popular television courtroom drama “Judge Judy” has been assailed with recent accusations that its tag line, “Real people, real cases, Judge Judy” is inaccurate.
“The show claims to use real people, but this is misleading,” stated Hank Piedlourde of the Center for Truth in White Trash Television. “Many of the show’s participants have been cyborgs. We’ve also found evidence of the use of mannequins, blow-up dolls, and several members of the Kappa Alpha Theta sorority.”
Petri Hawkins-Byrd, Judge Judy’s trusty bailiff, admitted that the show doesn’t always live up to its slogan. “A good 60% of the plaintiffs and defendants are robots,” Byrd said. “And most of the witnesses are inflatable.”
Piedlourde has also suggested that Byrd himself is a hologram and Judge Judy Scheindlin is actually a hyper-evolved muskrat. “These people have been fooling American trailer park communities for too long. It’s time they were brought to-”
Piedlourde was unable to complete his comment due to a sudden short circuit in his upper spine that caused his head to explode. The investigation will be picked up by an undisclosed agent of CTWTT.