Top Ten Withheld Excerpts From Kenneth Starr’s Report

  1. Kenneth Starr was abused as a child

  2. Diet Dr. Pepper does taste more like regular Dr. Pepper

  3. Get high, get stupid, get impeached
  4. Boris Yeltsin is personally responsible for 5% of the world’s liver transplants
  5. Alan Greenspan died in 1975
  6. Clinton’s a screamer
  7. Chelsea videotaped it all
  8. The stain was inside the dress
  9. Hillary is the only woman in America who hasn’t slept with the President
  10. Al Gore is more machine than man