The ASUC senate stunned the campus community yesterday with the sudden announcement that they would not ask Barnes and Noble to take over management of the ASUC Store. Instead, a ten year contract has been signed with the restaurant franchise, Hooters. “We’re nursing a better relationship with this organization,” argued ASUC Executive Vice President Lee Fink. “We’re still feeling up the details right now, but rest assured that we’ll keep the students abreast of the situation. We’re going to milk this for all its worth.”
Although the plan is still in its infancy, it has already been heavily criticized on many counts. All ASUC employees will be subjected to a new hiring standard, based on Hooters’ criteria. Additionally, Hooters does not have to guarantee a profit. Indeed, Hooters will receive payment for services rendered as long as they “supply the ta-tas.” According to one dissatisfied senator, who wished to remain nameless, “Fink is a boob.”