Shortage Feared

Thousands of people may be affected by an ovary shortage expected to hit Berkeley by the end of the month. “We ask that people remain calm and do not resort to hoarding ovaries,” said Berkeley Mayor Shirley Dean, hoping to avert similar incidents which occurred during the now infamous Sperm shortage of 1989. Ovary rationing programs may begin taking effect within a matter of weeks. Young women, especially Asians and Minorities, are being encouraged to donate their ovaries to combat the shortage.