Short Conversations

“Do you masturbate?”
“Just socially.”

“We at CalPIRG are distributing these paper flyers to fight deforestation.”

“Stupid is as stupid does.”
“Fuck off Forrest.”

“Bless you my son.”
“Ooh! It’s sticky.”

“How do you compliment a North Carolinan?”
“I like your tooth.”

“Oh please, oh please, oh please!”
“You are unable to take this class, because…”

“What’s making that noise?”
“That’s the rabbi.”

“Was it good for you too?”
“Next.”