Top Ten Rules of Classroom Etiquette

  1. Always clap when “Applause” sign comes on
  2. Don’t make obvious balding or senility references
  3. Don’t jeer for over half the period after setting the class curve
  4. Never shout “They’re Greeeaaaat!!!!” when eating Frosted Flakes in lecture
  5. Always call in a bomb threat two full working days before your test
  6. Don’t ask professor for a higher grade immediately after sex
  7. Be generous with words like “messiah” on teacher evaluation form
  8. Don’t shave legs in section
  9. Send thank you notes to people you cheat from during tests
  10. Always address professors and T.A.s as “Your Majesty”