- Wild Sex
- We might reveal mystic secrets about our name
- Nothing illegal involved (except with printing, marketing, and distribution)
- Provides necessary qualifications for vice-presidency
- Editors won’t kill you for missed deadlines (bylaws limit them to maiming)
- We know a cheap lawyer for libel suits
- Comedy more effective form of communication than rioting
- While other are laughing at your jokes you can steal their wallets
- Doesn’t entail significant mutilation of limbs
- Sends powerful messages to both houses of congress
