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Top Ten Ways to Meet a Girl at Berkeley | The Heuristic Squelch
Volume 13- Issue 1

Top Ten Ways to Meet a Girl at Berkeley

August 1, 2003
  1. Two words: Platinum codpiece
  2. Learn a couple Elliot Smith songs on acoustic guitar; instantly become ball-deep in poontang
  3. E-vite for one
  4. Become an RA
  5. Ask your ex for all her friends’ phone numbers
  6. Hang out outside girl’s bathroom. Try very hard not to be creepy.
  7. Standard naval spiral search pattern
  8. Your uncle just sent you this old lamp he found in Arabia
  9. You’re the student, she’s the GSI
  10. Get drunk at a Cloyne party, find out you both like that one cool band, make out and never see each other again